…Technically yesterday, because I just looked at the time and it’s 1:30am.
So yeah, I didn’t really feel nervous in the build up to it. Frankly I was looking forward to the openness of being around other students at my uni with anxiety. Although I may have freaked out slightly about 10 minutes before when I wanted to just triple check the lecture theatre it was in on the uni emails and the system was glitching and not giving me access. But after going to The Base and uncomfortably asking the receptionist to double check, I got to the right place and was on time.
I put on a very collected demeanor and walked into the lecture theatre. I noticed a lot of students sitting there looking absolutely on edge. I didn’t see anyone I recognised, which was a bit disapointing. I wrote a name badge and took a questionnaire and sat down on one of the front rows. There was a girl sitting on her own there and I internally debated whether to go by the usual unspoken rule of l Continue reading “First Group CBT Thing was Today”
So I got invited to join some group CBT sessions the the university are doing on Wednesdays for the next three weeks. Initially I freaked out when I opened the email, as it was completely unexpected, but now I’m feeling pretty positive about it. It will be something new and not unwelcome to be in a group of people my own age who have this kind of thing, not having to feel apologetic if I’m shy with new people because that’s kind of the issue we’re here about. Heck, I might even make friends. Or everyone will just be horrendously awkward with each other, including me. I can imagine a lot of the other people coming will be bricking it. Either way “It’ll be an experience” eh?
So it feels like ages since I last posted. In a nutshell what has happened since then is I finished CBT for social anxiety, I had end of year exams which stressed me out a lot considering they don’t even count towards my degree, my internship got postponed until next summer, I finished first year (and sort of fell for someone in the last few weeks, round of applause for me…) and I came home for the summer.
In a nutshell. But you know I never just write “In a Nutshell”!
On the SA front: I finished CBT after 10 sessions, and it seems to me like I can barely remember the stuff I learnt but somehow anxiety improved a lot anyway. I’ve practically written a book from the notebook/diary thingy I had to keep documenting all the situations that happened which caused me anxiety. The psychologist guy read it every week, and towards the end he said there was a Continue reading “End of first year, CBT… General Positivity (really scraping the barrel for a title here, can you tell?)”